¿Como se dice ‘root canal'?

Chieftain 'And Furthermore' column from April 29, 2011

Now you're speaking my language. Or spelling a second language I barely speak.

I threw my shoulder out trying to dress for springtime in Wallowa County. All those abrupt wardrobe changes. Started the day in a stocking cap, down jacket and insulated boots, then got streamlined to a t-shirt and shorts during the twenty minutes of sunshine. And back to foul weather gear for the driving snow flurries. What got me was the sudden spell where it was sunny to the left of me, snowing behind and a windstorm kicked up on the right … I hadn´t stretched out properly and – boop – my rotator cuff just couldn´t keep up with putting on a jacket and taking off a sweatshirt simultaneously. You won that round, Wallowa County weather. I know when I´m beat.

So it turns out Mexico is beautiful this time of year. And last-minute tickets to Mazatlan are really very reasonable. Wallowa County amigos Hilary Valentine, Edie Baffaro and Jake Kurtz have a house rented in Mazatlan and we haven´t seen one snowflake. Not a one.

Concern over sunburn v. hypothermia is just a plane ride away. Thanks, Alaska Airlines.

My spanish is just good enough that most people can understand I´m trying to speak spanish. Beyond that not much information is being transferred. The exchange rate is about eleven to one. I understand that one word, but those other eleven are something of a mystery. I´ve been told by plenty of english speakers back home that they don´t understand me either, so it´s bueno.

Another factor for Operation Mexico is that I´ve been putting off a root canal for a long while and was given the name of a specialist down here that comes highly recommended. I figured this might be the perfect time to get this root canal taken care of, since I can´t even explain in english why I´ve waited so long, or don´t floss as much as I should. So the language barrier is working in my favor on this one.

I was also given the name of a root canal specialist over in Lewiston who I´m sure is top-notch, but Lewiston seems like a foreign country anyway and as much as I like savoring the aroma of Potlatch, I went for the beach along the Pacific instead.

My plan to see the dentist is going perfectly, since I arrived during La Semana Santa, Holy Week, and every dentist is away on Easter vacation. The secretary for one dentist told me the doctor was up north, visiting some place called Lewiston. Crazy.

Jake Kurtz has an extensive knowledge of tacos in their various forms and I have learned a great deal by tagging along on his mission to sample a taco at every roadside stand in the greater Mazatlan metropolitan area. Al pastor, cabeza, lengua, carne asada … Jake is fluent in taco-ease and I’ve picked up a few terms here and there, like ‘mas papel higienico,’ for one.

Also met Bill from Pendleton during my rambles around Mazatlan. Bill Glenn. Lives in Portland now. He walked up while I was being lost near the cathedral in the old part of Mazatlan. Bill´s t-shirt announced in bold letters that he was a volunteer tourist aide.

That's Bill in the middle. That's me on the right in about twenty years.

He asked if I was lost. I said yes, but I was OK with that. Bill understood. He filled me in on some Mazatlan points of interest and we agreed I would show him around the Wallowas next time he came out for Chief Joseph Days.

So I had a t-shirt made up that explains I´m a volunteer ambassador for Wallowa County. Hope you guys don´t mind. I just about had a family convinced to come up and visit for springtime in the Wallowas, until we got to the part of what they should bring for clothing. I didn´t know the word for either ´longjohns´ or ´pretty much everything you have´and was flipping through the dictionario so fast that I aggravated that strained rotator cuff again.

See you in another week or so, Wallowa County. I´ll be wearing my souvenir sunburn and being happy about it.